So she sends me over here...

Megs then sent me over to the doggie ones and I started clicking through them.. thought this one was cute.. and again with the timing thing, though my dad is supposed to be coming to visit this weekend..


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Timing...

My friend Megs sent me this just as I was telling her how my husband was having a b*tch fit...


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Who's in Charge

Who's in Charge

All the organs of the body were having a meeting,
trying to decide who was the one in charge.

'I should be in charge,' said the brain,
'Because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen.'

'I should be in charge,' said the blood ,
'Because I circulate oxygen all over so without me you'd all waste away.'

'I should be in charge,' said the stomach ,
'Because I process food and give all of you energy.'

'I should be in charge,' said the legs,
'Because I carry the body wherever it needs to go.'

'I should be in charge,' said the eyes,
'Because I allow the body to see where it goes.'

'I should be in charge,' said the rectum,
'Because I'm responsible for waste removal.'

All the other body parts laughed at the rectum
and insulted him, so in a huff, he shut down tight.
Within a few days,
the brain had a terrible headache,
the stomach was bloated,
the legs got wobbly,
the eyes got watery,
and the blood was toxic.
They all decided that the rectum should be the boss.
The Moral of the story?
The a** hole is usually the one in charge!

If you don't send this to at least three people....who gives a sh*t?

Divorced Barbie - Joke

One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly remembers that it's his daughter's birthday. He pulls over to a toy shop and asks the sales person, "How much for one of those Barbie's in the display window?"

The salesperson answers, "Which one do you mean, sir? We have: Work Out Barbie for $19.95, Shopping Barbie for $19.95, Beach Barbie for $19.95, Disco Barbie for $19.95, Ballerina Barbie for $19.95, Astronaut Barbie for $19.95, Skater Barbie for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.95."

The amazed father asks: "It's what?! Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and the others only $19.95?"

The annoyed salesperson rolls her eyes, sighs, and answers: "Sir..., Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's Car, Ken's House, Ken's Boat, Ken's Furniture, Ken's Computer and. ..one of Ken's Friends."